Life with Two Girls

My Girls

We've been home with Zinash now for almost 6 weeks. Overall we're doing really well with the transition. Zinash is an amazing girl and she and Mihret have a lot of fun together! We run into little bumps in the road here and there, but overall, we're having a great time together.

Here are some random tidbits from our first month and a half as a family.

1. Light Wars
Chuck likes a dimly lit room; Zinash likes ALL the lights on all over the house. Oh the hilarity that ensues...

In need of a good pair of sunglasses

2. Learning from Each Other

Try this!

Zinash is learning English quickly but of course she speaks broken English. Mihret - our highly verbal child who has been speaking in complete sentences for over a year - has picked up broken English from Zinash.

Zinash: "Me no this!"
Mihret: "Me no this either!"

Does that mean that they are both becoming bilingual?

Zinash, on the other hand, is learning the fine art of whining from Mihret. If I close my eyes, sometimes I'm not sure who is whining. I close my eyes a lot.

3. The Laundry Monster
We added one child to the family and doubled the amount of laundry we do. How did that happen?

4. On the Go
I hear the question, "Where are you going?" multiple times a day. It actually means, "Where are WE going today? Can we please go somewhere? How about a park? Please, please, please!!!"

Most days we do make it to a park. The girls both LOVE the park, the weather has been great lately, and running around laughing does all of us good. Sometimes, of course, I have to say something like, "Well, we need to go to....but if we have time, we'll stop by a park." Mihret's response is always, "I have time!" Good to know.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

5. Joy
Although life with two girls comes with new challenges, the last six weeks have been full of joy for me - and it seems that they have been full of joy for all of us. Mihret adores her older sister (except when she doesn't want to do what Mihret wants to do); Zinash thinks her little sister is adorable (except when she doesn't take no for an answer). They both love to laugh and chase each other around; they have a great time helping me cook; they make incredible messes together with paint or water or sand or mud. Chuck and Zinash have a really sweet, fun, playful relationship (even when Dada makes her eat her broccoli - amazing but true), and Zinash is very loving and cuddly with me (unless I'm making her do something terrible like subtraction). Life is good. Some days are hard, but overall, the joys outweigh the challenges. Thank You, Lord!

First trip to the zoo

Painting...PRE-mess

Building Castles Together

My Joys

There and Back Again: Heading Home

Friday was our last day in Ethiopia. By Friday, Zinash and Mihret had become great friends with B and F, two of the children who had been adopted by the couple from New York. I went out for one last shopping trip and the kids chased each other around the Guest House and had a great time together.

Zinash, F, and B playing with bubble wrap

Mihret and B trying to find Zinash and F

Are they in here?

Yep! Quick, let's get away...

Go ahead and pop bubble wrap, guys. I've got more important things to do!

B and F's dad brought some ice cream to the Guest House just before it was time for us to leave, so all the kids enjoyed a special treat before heading out.

Mmmm....ice cream!

We got to the airport with plenty of time and had no problems getting through ticketing, immigration, or security. Once we got through security, Zinash rode an escalator for the first time. She got lots of practice by the time we got home but she still thinks that escalators are super fun.

We were taking the same flight to Dubai as B and F's family, but little J and Mike were taking a different airline so we said our goodbyes to them in the airport.

Mike and baby J headed to the snow

Then Zinash saw our BIG airplane and prepared for her first airplane ride - not only her first airplane ride but the airplane ride that would take her away from everything that she had ever known. I kept wondering what was going through her mind. She didn't seem scared at all - just fascinated by everything.

Ready for an adventure

Both girls did great on the flights. Our first flight lasted four hours and took us to Dubai. We spent the night in the airport where we found slightly comfortable chairs - not quite comfortable enough to sleep in but the girls and I managed to sleep some anyway. Chuck quickly discovered that the airport had free wireless high speed internet and spent the hours catching up on hundreds of emails and making sure that his girls were safe. (In other words, he didn't sleep. Thank you for watching out for us, honey!)

The second flight lasted 16 hours. You can watch a lot of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse in 16 hours. It was a LONG flight. For all of us.

Remember, he was sleep-deprived...

But we made it! After 16 hours in the air, we arrived in Los Angeles! Then of course we had to go through immigration, collect our luggage, go through immigration again, wait for our sweet friend who was picking us up but got stuck in a traffic jam (stupid LA traffic), and drive home.

My dear friend also brought us a delicious dinner but we didn't get to enjoy it until the next day. We went straight to bed (around 4:30 pm) and I slept until Mihret woke up (for the day) at 11:30 pm. Chuck and I did some tag-teaming that night. Zinash woke up for the day around 1 am.

It is hard, hard, hard to have your days and nights switched twice in two weeks. Ethiopia is 11 hours ahead of California, so literally the days and nights are opposite. It took us over a week before we were able to stay awake past 7 pm or stay asleep past 5 am, but eventually we got back to a normal sleep schedule. If you know us well, you know that "normal" means that I sleep like the dead and Chuck and Mihret wake up when a leaf falls off a tree in the park down the street. Zinash...well, I think we're still figuring that out, but she seems to be somewhere in the middle.

So there you have it: our trip to Ethiopia...to a new daughter and sister...and back home again as a family of four.

There and Back Again: The Goodbye Party

Thursday afternoon we went over to Zinash's orphanage for her goodbye party. Everyone was excited to see Zinash again and Zinash was happy to be back. She disappeared quickly with her friends into her old room.

Zinash and a couple friends looking out the window of her old bedroom

Zinash sitting on her old bed

The staff bought a beautiful traditional Ethiopian dress for Zinash as a going away present

While Zinash was catching up with friends, I had the opportunity to meet Tigist, the nurse at Zinash's orphanage. She started by sharing medical information with me and then went on to tell me how much Zinash meant to her. She'd been working for the orphanage for the past 3 years. Around 2 years ago she realized that Zinash didn't have any extended family to come visit her on the Family Days that the orphanage offered every three months. Most of the other children would get visitors on those days, but Zinash never had a visitor. She decided that she would be Zinash's family on those days, so for the past two years she and Zinash have been spending the day together on Family Days.

We knew that Zinash didn't have any connection with extended family and I had wondered how she had felt on those days when extended family had the opportunity to visit. It brought tears to my eyes to realize that God had provided someone who loved Zinash and became family to her during some times when she may have felt like she was all alone. I thank God for Tigist and will always consider her my sister even though I only got to spend a couple hours with her. We made a commitment to stay in touch via email and we hope that we will get to see her again some day.

Tigist giving a special gift to Zinash

The goodbye party was emotional: both sad and sweet at the same time. The children sang many songs together. We were surprised to hear a few songs that we recognized such as "My God is so Big." The staff and children offered words of affirmation about Zinash and hopes for her future. They prayed for her and had snacks together. We finished up by taking a large group picture. Of course, I followed that by taking tons of pictures of Zinash and her friends. :) I can't post those photos online but they are absolutely precious to Zinash and she will proudly show them to you if you come to visit.

We met the psychologist who worked with the children at the orphanage and he encouraged us to take pictures of Zinash in her favorite places. One of the places she chose was the top of the slide. :)

One of Zinash's Favorite Places

We also got to meet an American woman who has been volunteering at the orphanage teaching English. Her husband is a doctor who works at a hospital in Addis Ababa. She and her teenage son both spend time volunteering at the orphanage on a regular basis. Zinash loves her and got a great foundation for learning English from her. I am convinced that Zinash's transition and English language acquisition has been easier because of the time she spent with her English teacher. The English teacher was also happy to meet us and find out that Zinash would be going home to a family who loves Jesus and would love her well.

Zinash and her English Teacher

Mihret made lots of friends while we were there and speaks fondly of Zinash's friends. Mostly, though, she just wanted to be wherever her sister was!

Sisters!

Eventually it was time to give final hugs and say goodbye.



Some day when the girls are older we hope to go back to visit. I hope that when that day comes we get to see some of the people who invested in Zinash's life over the six years she spent at the orphanage. They are amazing people and they clearly loved our daughter. We are very thankful for them!

There and Back Again: Day 6

We spent Thursday back at the orphanages. We visited Layla House, Mihret's old orphanage, in the morning and went back to Zinash's orphanage in the afternoon for her goodbye party.

Mihret and I went back to the baby/toddler rooms where several more caregivers remembered her. She got more hugs and kisses than she knew what to do with, but she also got a delicious meal of injera and wat for her troubles. She now refers fondly to the baby/toddler rooms at Layla House as the "injera place" (which is actually pretty funny because we ate injera EVERY day while in Ethiopia so it was certainly not the only place she had it...).

Impromptu lunch... ("Come! Eat! Eat!")

...which Mihret LOVED!

I love this series of pictures of Mihret with one of the caregivers at Layla House. When we picked her up in 2007, the other staff referred to this dear woman as Mihret's "mama" at Layla.

She remembered Mihret and was happy to see her again. We were able to take some updated pictures. Even though it didn't mean a whole lot to Mihret at the time, it was so sweet to me to see them together again.


We weren't the only ones who were busy. Chuck was also making friends!

Destined to be the father of girls

After our visit to Layla House, we went out to lunch with another of the dads who was staying at Guest House with us and his adorable little son.

Mike and sweet little J

Peek-a-boo!

Mmm...mango juice...

We headed back to the Guest House for naps and then went to Zinash's orphanage for her goodbye party. The goodbye party was meaningful and significant. It deserves its own post and also deserves to be written when my brain is working better than it does at 10:30 pm. To be continued...

There and Back Again: Day 5

Wednesday of our time in Ethiopia began with a trip to the US Embassy. We were scheduled to have our interview there in order to get Zinash's visa. The problem was that we didn't know if the correction to our visa approval paperwork had arrived at the embassy. We knew that the LA USCIS office had made the correction and forwarded to the National Visa Center, but as of Tuesday, the correction had not been relayed to the US Embassy in Ethiopia. When we got to the embassy, Gail checked with the embassy and found out that they received the correction BUT it was on the wrong form. They agreed to interview us that day but said that they would not be able to release Zinash's visa until they received the information on the correct form. We were thankful that they were willing to interview us that day because if they hadn't, we most likely would have been delayed in leaving Ethiopia. Still, there was no guarantee that we would leave Ethiopia as scheduled on Friday.

When we got back to the Guest House, Chuck sent out SOS emails to the US office of our adoption agency and to Project Hopeful/EACH. They started connecting with the powers that be trying to make sure that the correction on the correct form got to the embassy by Friday morning. All of this was complicated by the fact that Washington DC (home of the National Visa Center) was basically shut down due to a terrible snow storm.

That afternoon Zinash discovered my video camera and shot her first footage. Warning: If you have a problem with motion sickness, you might want to skip this video. :)

Shortly thereafter I left Chuck with the girls (but not the video camera...) and went out to do a little shopping for gifts and souvenirs. Dawit took me and a couple of the other people at the Guest House to a row of shops. Shopping in Ethiopia involves negotiating prices which is something I'm not particularly good at. I knew that I was getting the special ferenge (foreigner) price which is most definitely higher than the habesha (Ethiopian) price, but when I would do the conversion to US dollars, most of the prices seemed like such a steal that I hated to negotiate them down much.

One of my favorite things to shop for in Ethiopia are silver Ethiopian crosses

Before I left the Guest House I asked Zinash what she wanted me to buy for her. She said she wanted an Ethiopian dress that went down to her ankles and her preferred color was pink. It took a while but I eventually found dresses for both girls. Unfortunately, they were both too big, but better too big than too small. Maybe next year they'll be able to wear them.

Getting a jump on dress shopping for next year

Eating in America

Zinash has been doing an amazing job of trying new foods. Up to this point in her life, her diet has consisted primarily of a flat bread called injera and a variety of spicy stewed meats, lentils and vegetables called wats. She also ate white bread, called dabo, tea, mangoes, bananas, other "tropical fruit," and popcorn. I'm sure there were other foods she ate as well, but those seemed to be primary.


She came to the US and found out quickly that we didn't have a ready supply of injera or wats (unless we drove 45 minutes to an hour to get to Little Ethiopia in downtown Los Angeles); the mangoes and bananas weren't as tasty; and that we loved cheese, which is something she never ate in Ethiopia. She has been a champ, though, at trying foods - even though she only likes about half of what she tries. So here's a partial list of the likes and dislikes of Zinash as we have discovered thus far...

Foods Zinash Likes	Not So Much
Oranges	Cantaloupe
Red apples	Green apples
Raisins	Dried bananas, apples, or strawberries
Mango and pineapple	Plums
Green grapes	Any green vegetable
White bread	Wheat bread
Apricot or mango jam	Strawberry or raspberry jam
Apple or mango juice	Milk (except with cereal)
Scrambled eggs	Omelettes
Bacon	Sandwich meat
Pancakes	Sandwiches
Cheerios and Life cereals	Oatmeal
Tacos (without cheese)	Salsa
Hamburger	Cheeseburger
Anything with spicy (but not too spicy) meat	Anything with cheese
Rice	Mashed potatoes
Pizza (as long as there isn’t much sauce or cheese)	Tomato-based sauces
Peanut butter	Regular butter or margarine
Popcorn with sugar	Popcorn with butter and salt
Pita chips	Hummus

Zinash at the Guest House in Ethiopia trying ice cream. The verdict is still out on the ice cream: she liked the taste but said that it made her teeth hurt.

There and Back Again: Day 4

On Tuesday of our trip, we visited several orphanages.

We started out with a visit to Layla House, where Mihret lived before we brought her home. We delivered letters and took lots of pictures for families who are in the process of adopting children from Layla House. We saw the Layla School in action and spent some time in the baby rooms.

Mihret was excited to see the wall with the picture of Winnie the Pooh. It is the wall that leads to the baby and toddler area at Layla. Mihret has seen it in pictures from our trip to Ethiopia in November of 2007 to bring her home.

Mihret with her buddy, the new son of the couple from New York who adopted a sibling set of 3 and was staying at the Guest House with us

One of the caregivers in the baby area remembered Mihret and gave her lots of hugs and kisses. Actually everyone who met Mihret and was reminded that she had been at Layla as a baby covered her with hugs and kisses, which was very sweet but got a little old for Mihret.

Kisses and Hugs for Mihret

One of the amazing caregivers at Layla House blowing bubbles for a group of very excited toddlers

After that, we visited the orphanage where Zinash lived. The orphanage has two sites: one site for the younger children and administrative offices and another for the older children. We started out at the younger children/admin site. We delivered some donations and again took pictures for families in process of adopting children from there. There have a great play area, so the girls took the opportunity to have some fun.

Mihret just hanging around

Beautiful girl!

Dada and his girls

Lastly, we visited the site for the older children which was where Zinash had been living for the past several years. She was very happy to see some friends and we enjoyed meeting the people who had loved and nurtured her.

The front of the orphanage

Chuck and Mihret meeting the orphanage dog, Patches

One of the caregivers with Zinash

Another person who had a positive impact on Zinash

One of Zinash's favorite things to do

We are very grateful for the people who cared for our daughters and the places that they called home. It was a privilege to be able to meet some of those people and see the ways in which they love the children in their care. May God bless each one of them!